Where my mind goes.

I felt this. 

I feel heavy. My heart and eyes and chest are heavy.

Stay, rest, be here, it will change, just wait a bit longer, just wait, buy a home here, have kids here, follow your dreams, go here, not there, you didn't see enough of this place, it would have been better, I know more than you, I've lived longer, shit, you didn't understand, secrets, pain, secrets, changes, not enough, seeping through, fuck, pain, get away, how could I leave, unhappiness, loneliness, a big house, coffee breaks, no one comes, us, what does that mean, a circle of people alone in the world, isolated, no one else is good enough, we are special, we are alone, we are mad, impatient, stagnant, waiting for the other to make the next move, who will go first, who will be left behind, who will have to worry, who will carry the guilt and the pain and the mystery. Who will not care, who will be free, who will be ignorant, who will be free. Who will be free. Who will find love. Who will be free.

I cried. 

I felt better. 

It's where my mind goes sometimes. 

Moon Goddess- Josephine Wall