Tofino

It's midnight and I'm sitting looking out at the black harbour from the windows of HI Tofino. Last night I camped in the rain, tonight I'm here and I may change again tomorrow.

Tofino is, as it always has been for me. RAW. In every sense- the landscape, swells, and emotion. The hostel is the most beautiful HI I've stayed at so far. A solid atmosphere and eire sense of normality of many people on their electronics in common rooms. Guilty here.

I was able to go body surfing twice today, at Cox Bay and South Chestermans. The waves were fairly small- it was a large outgoing tide so tomorrow I will try the incoming/ high tides.

I've felt so lost here. Yesterday my hands shook and face sweat as I set up my tent. I had gotten off the bus with no place to stay. As it was a major weekend for Tofino, all places were full. I got off the bus early to walk towards Tofino in hopes of finding a spot in the forrest to pitch my tent. I had forgotten how thick the undergrowth is here. No chance of finding a spot. I walked on, hoping to get signs from the universe- some sort of direction- while trying not to feel panicked. A couple pointed me in the direction of the Bella Pacific Campground. They had space.

Last night I was scared of the rain. I felt connected to the homeless, diseased, scared, and lost souls of the night. I was warm though, and safe. The rain came in through different parts of the tent (that was made for desert conditions). Overall, though, I was so impressed with it, but threw it out as the elastics in the poles were long gone.

I felt scared and lost yesterday. This morning at the first light I called the hostel to see if they had any reservations cancel. They did, and for that I am thankful. It had been calling for rain all day today but it was bluebird sky until the sun went down. Ah southern weather.

It's raining lightly now and I feel safer and more grounded than before.

I also wanted to note that I began coming here 3 years ago, when my brother worked in Ukee. I am forever thankful of the impact he's had on people here, as from his interactions come amazing opportunities and gifts for me that keep on happening each year.

This place.